Short Victim’s Stories

I have had trouble with setting boundaries in my life because it got mixed with the message about being selfish. Since I heard constantly during my growing years that others thought I was selfish I learned not to assert myself just to have friends. Many of my mother’s lectures were about standing up for myself and stop being selfish. In my young mind I could not discern a difference or why I was accused of being selfish. So many lectures ending in me crying. I mentally berated myself for being selfish and resolving to do better. I could not see that I was dammed if I did and dammed if I didn’t. Looking back I think these lectures were actually because I was trying to set boundaries that my parents didn’t like and didn’t want to work around. I was their oldest child. I can see now from this article that I trusted first and asked questions after with many people and therefore the hurt and anguish I have suffered in many ways is my own fault for not being able to set boundaries for myself and adhere to them. The reason for that was low self esteem. Now I am again establishing boundaries and I see how valuable they are not only for maintaining my online security but also for building my value with others.

After the scam I thought that almost everything was about what I lost and just a bit about what took me there and what I could actually learn from it. Same for other adversities in life. I learned the hard way that it was about admitting what had happened, learned why it happened so I could prepare myself and heal from past traumas, get to know myself and how I can grow, embrace uncertainty, learn how to act (instead of just react) in adverse situations, and asking for help.

Once I realized I was victimized, I looked further at the Facebook profile the criminals used. I believe the hijacked someone else’s posts and simply replaced the photos. The text for the posts were of different dates, but each photo had been uploaded on December 3, 2023. Of course, I didn’t dig that deep until it was over. They also tried to do a “live video” with me.

I now realize they were holding an actual piece of paper, a photo of the person in the FB profile. All I could see was an eye, eyebrow and part of the cheek because they were holding the print so close to the camera. And there was no audio because “the internet connection was very bad” at the time.

I definitely ignored the red flags and believed what I wanted to believe.

You know I hate to say it but he showed up as James Donald then he showed up as James Batman Hudson Jacob Batman Hudson are the real Batman Hudson. They’re all scams. I have lost thousands of dollars stupid enough to still believe what I’ve seen and knew it was not real and still believe it they can woo you like no tomorrow they’re good at their job, but I have learned for over two years finally get wise. I’ve done my own investigation to the ones I’ve been talking to me now found out they’re not real found out that if he says he’s still in the military, he is not in the military. He’s retired. He’s married and he’s happily married. He needs to be left alone just like as women need to be left alone and somehow someway, these people have got to be stopped. I cannot believe this world allows people to do this, but it happens so women please be careful to who you talk to. There’s no real love over the Internet. I got lucky Two years ago well 18 years ago, but I walked away from it because of differences, but and it wasn’t a Jake hudson and totally different man. He was real that was one in 1 million. I hate to say it, but I guess you need to go out to a bar go to church stand in the grocery store with a cucumber. I have no clue how to find a man. I am too old for this. I am 64 years old and still should be smarter than that I was but if anybody does Jake Hudson or even has a different name, but shows those photos I’ve got every photo I’ve got personal photos. I don’t know if any of you women have received the personal photos that I’ve received. I’ve got hundreds of photos trust me hundreds of names that they used phone numbers emails. He’s gorgeous from her, but we’re not gonna get him. He’s not available, but the man have his peace. Let the man be able to walk out in the street without somebody coming up and saying something stupid to him. Let him live his life. Let him be with his wife and children I hate to say this I wish that was with him, but anyway, ladies, let’s open the eyes close our hearts it’s not him And I am very sorry for all the women who have gotten their heart broken and their bank account broke give me more

For a person with empathic tendencies, sadness is a very DEEP feeling for me. I have experienced sadness is several waves since the ending of my crime. Currently I am in the middle of another wave. I intend to discuss this in depth with my therapist. I find I am thinking about the criminals right now, the way they worded their messages, the feelings those messages evoked, the words they used. Yes, I miss it. But equally I also think of the times the criminals used anger, frustration, the words used then and how those words made me feel. Quite often when I was in the midst of the crime and love was freely expressed I would find music and memes that I would share with the criminals (thinking they were the celebrity they were impersonating). Often a heart emoji would come from the criminal to these memes or music. Sometimes it was comments about how they agreed with the thought in the meme or how the music made them feel and identify with me. There were lengthy messages sometimes expressing deep felt love and affection, how much they felt I was the perfect person for them. I now understand that these messages were all fake, probably part of the story line or something they felt had worked particularly well with another victim. However, because I feel things so very deeply, it is the worst type of betrayal to realize how fake those “love letters” were. At the end of the crime one of the deepest hurts was when they told me all the stuff I shared was stupid and revealed just how unintelligent they thought I am. How glad they were to not have to deal with me any longer. Then just two weeks after the end of the crime and I had signed out of Telegram, Instagram and turned off Facebook notifications I received an email stating how much they missed me, that they were sorry. It was a very long email detailing how much they had messed up in treating me the way they did. Sometimes it takes me a while to process my emotions because at times those emotions are raw and hurting, it’s almost like I have to “scab over” before probing the wound. This is one of those times. I am sad at what I perceive I have lost. Those “love letters” were glorious. There is no one in my life that has ever written such beautiful letters to me. They made me feel special. So I am letting myself feel that grief and sadness. I have to do it a different way because music was such a large part of my crime. I find it difficult to stream music or listen to the radio because the songs come up that the criminal identified as those that made “them” think of me.